I have been slacking off. In regards to my eating, working out and life in general. It’s all been cumulating over the past 2 weeks, and the final kicker was my ankle injury last week. Ever since then, I’ve been unable to stop eating and I am currently downward spiraling. As we speak. Adding to that, the non fitness parts of my life aren’t great, so I am on track to gaining all the weight back that I lost.
I can’t figure out what is wrong. I know when I’m at work, I’m miserable and don’t want to be there, but that hasn’t changed in the past 5 yrs. I have been doing more towards my fitness career, so perhaps that is putting a spotlight on the fact that my 9-5 job is energy draining… I have this knee issue that I feel all the time, that bothers me…. I signed up for Match, but don’t think I would actually date anyone because I don’t feel good about myself…. I just need a break from it all and I need to do better.
I signed up for a 12 week career bootcamp. I know that my job is just an external issue, so in theory fixing that might not fix the internal issues. My mom always says “Wherever you go, there you are.” If you hate yourself or are depressed, that will make you even more so. But I’m also working on the internal stuff as well. The job is just such a major factor in my mood and life, I know that things will change once I get a new job so I decided to get some outside help in the job hunting department. It’s a 12 week program that provides resources, coaching, resume and linkedin help… so it seems pretty good.
I also signed up for my AFAA certification course to be a certified fitness instructor, so I can study for that in these 12 weeks. Plus I want to do an elimination diet, so no alcohol, sugar (!!!), soy and gluten. The major thing I want to eliminate is the alcohol and the sugar because I am addicted to sugar and alcohol just wastes my time. I want to focus on exercise, physical therapy, recovery and getting healthy. With each day, I see more concerning behavior, like buying Baskin Robbins 3 times in the past 2 weeks, and getting 3 scoops each time. If I had a therapist, I would ask how someone could fall so far from grace in 3 weeks… But I’m reading the signals and am changing things up NOW.
The bootcamp starts on Sunday, but I’m starting immediately.
Phase 1- Week 1-2
- No alcohol (!)
- No sugar (!!)
- 8 glasses of water per day
- At least 7 hrs of sleep per night
- Daily meditation and affirmations.- I realize that my job isn’t great, but it pays my bills, so I’m grateful
- Daily physical therapy exercises
- Crossfit or fitness class 4x per week
- Daily blog posts
- Participating in the Career Bootcamp and the meditation programs that I signed up for
I want a life makeover, but no one is going to do it for me. I need to do it for myself. I can be better and reach my weight, fitness and professional goals. 2018 will be the year.